undefined state of happiness

been so happy lately for no good reason at all :) but being happy is good .... regardless that there's no need to be happy really; now this is something I can be worried about I mean there are reasons why I should be happy, but it's not the actual reason why I feel happy at the moment and if I went deeper into it, and gave it a little thought I'll finally realize that I shouldn't at all be happy on the contrary I should be very concerned and upset and this brings me to anther thing, is happiness a choice? do people choose to be happy?? I might say that I do that, most of the time I choose to be happy like when something happens and it is supposed to be very sad and upsetting but it's being analyzed in a way to make it quite the opposite (of course it's me who do the analysis) so, I end up feeling happy and satisfied when I'm supposed to be angry and mad and raging with fury.... this is different of course from being inconsiderate or shallow.... but when you're the kind of person who can be easily wrapped up in your sadness and misery, you'll do everything you can to avoid being there... what is really annoying and can get right out of this mood of unexplained happiness, is taxi drivers.... God bless hem :S but, instead I started to try a different strategy now, and that is talking to the guy (an advice from a very wise man) I'm never afraid of talking to strangers as long as it's not at night, a rather quiet street or on a public transportation (I believe that it's a smart and easy way to be robbed, someone talking to you and having your full attention while another gets all they want from your handbag or whatever) but the taxi is not public, it's supposed to be a decent private means of transportation; but of course when you get on the taxi and smell the horrible odor of both the vehicle and the driver, you get stunned instantly (I do) and when he starts to go on his way, and you find it hard to even hear your phone ringing because of the noise coming out of every part of the car ...... and the driver; who's always playing something in whatever he uses to play songs (I tried to figure it out so many times but i never succeeded as i never saw 2 similar devices, it's not a cassette player or a radio, it's ....... whatever.....) so, you're stunned and then startled by the noise bursting out from all around you; and then you are numb for the rest of the way finally, you NEVER reach your destination because it's always a long, hard, and winding road :| i mean u NEVER get where you want no way you would.... are you expecting the taxi to take you just everywhere and anywhere?!!! can't you be grateful he got you just as close.... what's wrong with humans?!!!!!!!!!! are they always as greedy as that, can't they ever have enough?!!!!!!!!!!!! can't you use your feet and legs while you can!!!!!!!!!!!!! after the long and rather tiring journey, you're safe and sound ....and moreover disciplined... and you become more considering, appreciative and aware of your duties towards your fellow taxi drivers so, by recently talking with taxi drivers and having rather long conversations with them I can say that they are humans after all .... a very strange category of humans though ..... very amusing and imaginative, excellent narrators and the best thing about that (having that conversation), is getting safe and sound out of that taxi and paying a rather fair fare :D and most of the time being asked not to pay at all (but they take the money eventually of course) this is ideal for long distance rides as you'll amuse yourself for a while, and you won't have to pay all you got for that :) so, by getting over most of the taxi drivers, I can say that there's no reason at all to get me out of the undefined mood of happiness :D THANK GOD! a very Important note: I wrote this note on 11th of April, and now I can say that the good feeling's gone......I hate taxis, taxi drivers, any one who dares to tell me to get on a taxi or who takes a taxi themselves :S but, it never got me out of the undefined and dominant feeling of happiness :D curse you taxi driversssssssssssss :@

a change of mind . . . so what?!!!

I thought I would never do that, I was so convinced I was right, I had all the reasons to support me all the way! But after a while I changed my mind...so what?!!! And I do that all the time! Why changing one’s mind is is always considered weakness or a kind of hesitance; a fault, and people should be blamed for changing their mind! Why do people think you're wrong if you changed your mind about a certain thing, thought or situation! I have always had my mind changing for as long as I can remember, and I never thought it was wrong if you change your mind. Change is the only thing that never changes in life; there's always a change in something and all things have got to change at a certain point if not all the time. Then why people grant themselves the right to judge those who change their minds?! Isn’t change natural? Why then in this particular case it is considered wrong and not preferred or sometimes allowed! I think changing your mind is healthy in a way. And it's unfair if you never changed your mind, because you will be simply a one-way thinking person; not giving your thoughts a second chance to grow and develop!!!...and CHANGE! Right?! and maybe sometimes it's good to change your mind...and obviously right, but just for the sake of the concept people stick to their heads and become stubborn so no one might never ever say they changed their mind; as if it's a shame to do so!!! Changing your mind is really helpful and useful. I know people whose life is really messed up because of that they never like to change their mind! People who don't talk to each other, friends, families, and it's all because no one wants to admit that deep down they want to change their mind but they just can't! Sometimes pride and dignity overwhelm us; poor miserable humans, making us think we're the ultimate persons ever lived! well, just taking a look at all who passed away, and realising we can overlook so many unimportant things in life, to be brave enough to change our mind, and never being ashamed of having second thoughts. People sometimes seek help on how to hold on to their opinions and thoughts, when they are ought to get a lot of help on how to be more flexible and accept the fact that they might after all change their mind. I think I might change my mind later about this whole thing, and think the way people are thinking....who knows!!! I definitely don't! But I think I might Because it's my right to change my mind